Dear Twenty-Something, by Jillian DeBritz

My precious sister,


You. Are. Enough. Just as you are today, imperfect, in-process, in the midst of the battle you’re fighting—you are enough. Who you are is exactly who you are supposed to be—your personality, your sense of humor, your passions, your body, your emotions, your dreams, your quirks—they are all designed to reflect the beauty of the One who made you.


You are the only woman in all of history created with your exact combination of talents, experiences, and vision for the world. Be you, beautiful friend, all you, reflecting the glory of the One who lives inside you, revealing Himself through you in a way the world has never seen before.


The world desperately needs you, just as God created you to be.


Be you, friend. Fully you—alive and free and unashamed of God’s perfect design for your life.


Stop trying to be “her”. You know who I mean—the girl you compare yourself with, the one you admire (or the one you despise) who provides a basis for evaluating where you rank in the room. You notice her hair, how she curled it just enough to look styled but not so much it seems overdone. You check out her outfit, taking note of the new boots and sweater you should buy to feel as confident as she looks. You listen to how she prays, feeling less spiritual because of the words she uses that aren’t part of your vocabulary, or assuming you’re more holy because you aren’t struggling as she is right now.


I know you do this, because so do I. And it breaks God’s heart.


Comparison is a lie, dear one. It steals our confidence, our freedom, our ability to celebrate the beauty of God in others. Comparison ranks us according to the standard of other imperfect humans. It turns us against each other, brainwashing us into believing that someone else’s strength takes away from ours. It tells us to hide our struggle out of fear of exposure, to protect ourselves from perceived weakness. Comparison drives a wedge between us and the intimate friendships we long for, community where we are seen, known, and loved in the midst of our mess.


But Jesus.


Jesus meets us where we are today–not where we wish we were, where someone else is or where we pretend to be. He sees through our façade, the image we create to gain the approval of others, and He looks right into our heart. Jesus sets us free from comparison when He locks eyes with us and says, “Come, just as you are.”


There is no need to pretend in His loving gaze. Jesus sees you and knows you and calls you by name. You are the apple of His eye, the delight of His heart.  


You are enough because He is enough, and He is in you.


You are chosen.

You are set apart.

You are free from shame.

You are made new, from the inside out.

You are loved beyond measure.

You are enough, just as you are.


May we be women who set others free from the death-trap of comparison by celebrating the face of God in one another. Be who you are, and in so doing, release “her” to be who she is too. You are enough. And so is she.


I am with you in this battle for freedom from comparison, dear one. Let’s walk arm-in-arm, declaring the beauty we see in one another, releasing our sisters to be exactly, uniquely who God designed them to be.


Look into her eyes—you will see Jesus looking back at you. He sees you—and oh, how He loves you! Just as you are.



Jillian can be found at or head on over to her blog

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